EPIPHANY I
January 17, 2021
“Is Anyone Listening?”
Could you use a smile, or even a chuckle? We’re told it’s good for our health to laugh or feel amused. Humor is beneficial in lowering our blood pressure, gives our mental health a boost, and, in my opinion, goes a long way toward making life more pleasant in general. My days start with a cup of coffee and the newspaper, and as I read through the comic strips, I appreciate a little something that makes me smile. Awhile back, a favorite of mine, “Pickles,” also made me think a little beyond the clever wordplay. A senior couple, Opal and Earl, are pictured sitting on the couch; he has the newspaper open and she’s knitting. Their young grandson is leaning over the back of the couch between them. This is their “conversation”:
Opal: I had some almond milk today. I had never tried it before.
Earl: I thought I saw a possum in the yard. Or maybe it was a giant rat.
Opal: It was pretty tasty. I have no idea how they milk almonds, though.
Earl: It turned out it was the neighbor’s dog. Boy, is that mutt ugly.
Opal: You should try some.
Grandson, walking away: I love listening to Gramma and Grampa’s nonversations.
I’d be willing to guess that everyone reading this oblivious exchange has participated in a “nonversation.” You know what it’s like — you’re talking with someone when it becomes obvious they aren’t listening to you. Instead of paying attention to what you have to say, the person is preoccupied with formulating what they’re going to say next. If a conversation is a form of mutual communication, this would have to be considered the polar opposite — therefore, a “nonversation.”
Our interactions with one another are much more enjoyable when those involved have opportunities both to speak and to listen. Throughout the Bible, Moses, David and Isaiah ask God to listen to them and also tell their readers to listen to God’s words. God’s command at the time of Jesus’ transfiguration is recorded in Mark 9:7: Then a cloud overshadowed them, and from the cloud there came a voice, “This is my Son, the Beloved; listen to him!”
Asking questions out of genuine interest and then truly, intentionally listening to responses is probably the best way to develop a connection with others. Jesus asked his disciples, “Who do people say that I am?” The answers varied, and then he said, “But who do you say that I am?” and Peter responded, “You are the Messiah.” (portions of Mark 8:27-29) Jesus’ ministry is often spoken of as consisting of preaching, teaching, and healing, but that’s a very limited description. A number of accounts of healing involve Jesus speaking with and listening to those who needed his help. Parables, insightful questions, and attentive listening, were his teaching methods, and his followers didn’t just hear what he said, they listened.
If we feel that we are being caught up in “nonversations,” we have a model in our Lord, as we give equal value to speaking and listening, and doing both in love for one another.
Hoping to listen with the heart,
Your friend in Christ,
Mary Rogers